Why selling freelance writing is easier than selling aluminum siding

Okay, so I got an email today from a law firm in California (they are one of @ColdCallWriter's Twitter followers). They sell mediation services to companies.

They asked if I would like to be a freelance cold caller for them.

I thought it was a joke. Then the guy actually called today from California to repeat the offer.

Now what can one glean from this?

First, I think it shows how hard it is to convince most people to pick up the phone and sell something. If they're willing to give me, a complete stranger, a chance just because I write a blog ... psh. There you go.

Anyway, I politely declined their offer.

Why? As I explained to the mediation guy in an email, anyone, and I mean ANYONE, can sell freelance writing (or related freelance services).

Because if you find the right client, your stuff sells itself.

When I've got an interested prospect on the phone, I don't have to tell him or her my unique selling proposition or list features and benefits.

Honestly, until they see what I've written, they don't give a rat's.

My job is to answer their initial questions (usually few) and direct them to my online portfolio and resume.

Simple. A middle school kid could do it.

Now if I were selling mediation services (or aluminum siding or life insurance) through cold calls, it would be a different story.

That would require actual sales skills.

That would require a polished presentation.

That would require extreme motivation that withstands hang-ups, take-me-off-your-lists and stop-wasting-my-times.

I have so much admiration for people who have all of the above. But believe me, @ColdCallWriter is not one of them. The one time in 460 calls I had a guy get mad at me and tell me never to call again, I put down the phone and cried.

But I can sell freelance services. Because cold calling freelance services is a completely different (and gentler) process than what we usually think of when we think of phone sales.

BLOOPERS: I cold called so much, my phone died.

Well, that's what I tell people. Actually, I have no idea what happened. One minute I'm taking my visiting friend on a bike tour of Fort Collins breweries and the next I'm having a massive panic attack because my phone's screen has gone blank.

It's not exactly dead. It still vibrates and chirps and plays Ozzy Ozborne's "Crazy Train" when someone calls. But the screen is shot.

I have two conflicting feelings.

The first is terror. I have 460 phone calls out! What if one calls back before I can get my phone situation sorted out? I've put so much work into this cold calling thing, it just breaks my heart to think of even one little prospect slipping through my fingers.

(Rationally, there's very little chance this will happen at beer o'clock on a Saturday, but still.)

The other emotion is jubilation. Now I have the perfect excuse not to cold call. Perhaps my phone situation will be tied up for a whole week and I can have a break from reading the same script ad nauseum.

Alas, neither scenario comes to pass.

By Tuesday (when my dear friend departs and I resume business as usual), Virgin Mobile has overnighted me a spankin' new phone, so I am back on the cold calling war path.

I did miss one call from a new prospect. Fortunately she emailed me, so I was able to get back to her the same day.

What would I have done without a phone? I like to think I'd have forged on using Skype or similar. But truthfully, even though it doesn't scare me anymore, I haven't grown to adore cold calling. So I probably would have kicked back, taken the week off ...

... and had a really agonizing time getting back on the horse next Monday.

TIPS: Before you make 1,000 cold calls, check your phone plan

Ugh. I'm a bit of an infrequent cell phone user, so to save money, I'm on a $25-a-month, pay-as-you-go plan by Virgin Mobile.

Which was fantastic until I started spending an hour or more each day on the phone.

Just checked my phone bill and it's over $100.

Now, if I had been smart, I could have saved at least 60 of those dollars by upgrading to a better pay-as-you-go plan, at least for the remaining month of my campaign.

Another thing I should have done was switch off the automatic top-up feature (which allowed me to keep calling after maxing out my Anytime Minutes -- without realizing the massive charges I was racking up).

I've fixed the problems and in the end, it's all tax deductible so I'm not too bummed. Just hoping someone may learn from my mistake -- and save their business a few bucks!